Mailbag: A Whole Lot of Lies

That's right, Lance. Seven Tour titles. All lies.

I feel cheated. Lance Armstrong had to work hard to gain my respect. Seriously, he had to work really hard. When everyone else was jumping on the Lance Armstrong bandwagon, I still wasn't sure. I never knew why, but I just couldn't bring myself to like him. Perhaps it was because I was young. Maybe I didn't like yellow as a kid and didn't realize that yellow was a symbol of his dominance in cycling, but I just couldn't bring myself to appreciate him. But slowly, over a long period of time, my mindset began to change. Perhaps it was when my aunt got cancer. As she battled through that exhausting trial, maybe that's when things began to change for me. One way or another he had gained my respect as an athlete who had achieved a great miracle to become the most dominant man in the history of cycling. I genuinely believed him.

But now I'm just a chump like everyone else. Maybe it wasn't the color yellow that caused my displeasure. Maybe it was a feeling inside me. Maybe my instincts were telling me from the beginning, "Don't trust that man. As tempting as it is, don't trust him." I got suckered into a great story line, which seems to be happening a lot lately. It's heartbreaking that millions and millions of people stood behind yet another athlete using PEDs.

Is the main difference between Lance Armstrong and Barry Bonds just that Lance was more of a jerk? -Mike G.

Please understand, my following answer is in no way implying that Barry Bonds wasn't a jerk. I have heard and read far too many accounts to believe he was, by any stretch of the imagination, a nice guy. Ex-wives, ex-teammates, ex-employees of ball clubs have been told numerous stories that he was a jerk. Chalk a lot of it up to roid rage, but from what I understand, Barry Bonds was quite a scumbag.

However, I am inclined to answer this question with a yes. I believe that the main difference between Lance Armstrong and Barry bonds is that Lance has been more of a jerk. He has sued countless numbers of people and ruined their lives. Why? All because they were telling the truth about his use of performance enhancing drugs. All because they were ahead of the curve, condemning him of something that he has now received a lifetime ban from the United States Anti-Doping Agency for. He claimed slander, he claimed libel, and he went after people with a vengeance and destroyed their lives if he could. Only now we find out that those lives were destroyed because of a "ruthless desire to win." Ruthless is right.

Lance's interview with Oprah has been more
manipulative than apologetic so far.

And why is he admitting to it all now? He told Oprah he doesn't have a good answer to that question, that it's too late. He's right, it is too late. He should have done it before he destroyed people lives. Before he sued and harassed them for attempting to keep integrity in cycling. So why now? Because once again he is trying to manipulate life in his favor. He is trying to reduce his ban to eight years. USADA said this interview with Oprah isn't enough. They have said he needs to say it, under oath, directly to them.

His interview seemed to be another attempt to get America to love him. He took personal accountability, but mostly did so as he attempted to distance himself from it by pointing and saying "I see who I was, and he was arrogant." No, Lance, he is arrogant. You are arrogant. He apologized, but without seeming apologetic. He didn't apologize to anybody in particular, he simply apologized for his mistake. All the lives he ruined, the people he accused of slander and then slandered himself, did not receive an apology.

So yes, given the choice between the two, Lance was more of a jerk. And unless in part two with Oprah tonight he changes my mind, that's how I'm always going to view him.

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There's not a question about this situation that I don't have, but:

a) Did Manti Te'o fake having a girlfriend, or did he have a girlfriend he never met?

b) Which of the two is weirder?

P.S. If it's a hoax, I'm supposed to believe a Heisman candidate had a girlfriend that he never met in real life? I'm not even that pathetic. -Mike G.

First of all, Mike, I happen to know you're not that pathetic as you recently got married. Although, I've suspiciously never met her. Have you been catfished? I'm kidding, of course. I've seen pictures of the two of you, and you look great together. Congratulations.

But back to Te'o. I couldn't have said it any better. My mind has gone through a whirlwind of questions these past few days since the news broke. If you haven't read the Deadspin article, go read it now so you're up to speed.

At this point, I am still inclined to believe Te'o was duped and had no part to play in this. That being said, there are still far too many inconsistencies and unanswered questions for me to give him my full support just yet. And it just keeps getting weirder.

Did he meet Lennay Kekua after a game at Stanford? Did he meet her online? If he is the victim here, why has he left us under the impression that they met up in Hawai'i? Who was he talking to on the phone? Why didn't they Skype like every other long distance couple in the world? The list of questions could continue forever. My big question is this: if he really was in on the hoax from the beginning, what would his motive have been? When he started telling everyone he had a girlfriend, he wasn't on any Heisman radar, so he wasn't trying to add a story line to his senior season to get sympathy votes for a Heisman campaign. And then when his grandmother passed away, did he just think to himself "Oh, perfect timing, I'll kill off Lennay now." I just can't see that happening quite that way.

A lot of new information has come out after the initial Deadspin article surfaced. An article on SI.com with a transcript of an interview with Manti ten days after Kekua supposedly died. Interviews with people claiming to know the man behind the hoax, and that Te'o knew nothing and truly was the victim. Information showing that Te'o kept the story going even after he learned of its falsehood on December 6.  What on earth is going on?

At this point, I'm still with Te'o. After reading the SI.com transcript (very much worth the read) it seems to me that he sounded sincere. He was fuzzy on the details of how they met, but as the article states, if he met the girl online, you can understand why he would want to keep that information private. He also never once explicitly states in that interview that he had met up with Kekua in person. You would think that if this was a fictional tale he created that he would include that to make it sound more realistic. I believe he was genuinely fooled into believing he had fallen in love with a young woman named Lennay Kekua.

Here is where Te'o went wrong, however. After discovering the truth of it all on December 6, he should have gone straight to school administrators and gotten ahead of this thing and issued a statement and apology of his own. I'm sure he felt he was in too deep, and the times he spoke about his girlfriend publicly after December 6 were probably a result of him feeling cornered, trapped by this lie and not understanding a way out. He probably believed he could ride out the wave and it would all be fine. Clearly, however, that hasn't happened. And so he perpetuated the lie and is guilty of at least that.

Back to the original question, with everyone in America digging for the truth on this one, it's only a matter of time before we know the truth. Did he fake having a girlfriend, or did he have a girlfriend he never met? I think he had a girlfriend he never met. Or at least he thought he did. Which one is weirder? Now that's a good question, but in today's world of online dating (weird) I'm going to have to say that having a fake girlfriend is weirder.